Eridan: Be a Human.
Jul. 12th, 2011 08:00 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wweh(action: 1445 Mitchell, mid-afternoon)
[Eridan woke up... oddly, in one piece. The last thing he remembered was being split the fuck in half by Kanaya. Maybe it was that weird ghost bullshit that caused him to feel whole again, or maybe something else entirely. Not magic though. No way in hell it could be magic. That stuff's a load of musclebeast crap. So, he goes to get himself ready for the day... His normal clothes were missing. Rather odd, and they're rather ugly to him. His fear and anger only grow when he gets to the bathroom to get himself ready, noticing that he's an ugly shade of pink. Human pink. He screams rather loudly, as he runs out of the bathroom to figure out exactly what the hell is going on here.]
(phone, sometime later}
Alright, now who the fuckin' hell brought me back to life as a fuckin' pink human abomination! You're gonna fuckin' pay for it! Leave me your name so I can go for you fuckin' first when I smite all you landdwellers! If you think you can be desecratin' such royalty by makin' me some kind of ugly pink human alien, you've got another thing comin'!
[Eridan woke up... oddly, in one piece. The last thing he remembered was being split the fuck in half by Kanaya. Maybe it was that weird ghost bullshit that caused him to feel whole again, or maybe something else entirely. Not magic though. No way in hell it could be magic. That stuff's a load of musclebeast crap. So, he goes to get himself ready for the day... His normal clothes were missing. Rather odd, and they're rather ugly to him. His fear and anger only grow when he gets to the bathroom to get himself ready, noticing that he's an ugly shade of pink. Human pink. He screams rather loudly, as he runs out of the bathroom to figure out exactly what the hell is going on here.]
(phone, sometime later}
Alright, now who the fuckin' hell brought me back to life as a fuckin' pink human abomination! You're gonna fuckin' pay for it! Leave me your name so I can go for you fuckin' first when I smite all you landdwellers! If you think you can be desecratin' such royalty by makin' me some kind of ugly pink human alien, you've got another thing comin'!
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
[action]
Date: 2011-07-13 02:32 am (UTC)[Phone]
Date: 2011-07-13 02:43 am (UTC)You don't scare anyone! ♪
[phone]
Date: 2011-07-13 02:48 am (UTC)But let's have some Barton-brand wisdom first:]
Better an "ugly pink human" than dead, if you ask me.
Re: [phone]
Date: 2011-07-13 03:01 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 03:14 am (UTC)Well that's too bad. Cuz Mayfield likes to level the playing field.
action;
Date: 2011-07-13 03:15 am (UTC)Monsieur, I zhink it would be of your best interest if you kept your voice down.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 03:17 am (UTC)What do you mean?
I'm not exactly up to date on all this fuckin' human slang.
Re: [action]
Date: 2011-07-13 03:18 am (UTC)I don't even have my fuckin' fins anymore!
phone
Date: 2011-07-13 03:21 am (UTC)He also sounds like a douchebag. Hmmm... ]
We can hear you just fine, stop yelling!
no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 03:22 am (UTC)Re: [action]
Date: 2011-07-13 03:40 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 04:06 am (UTC)So, how the hell do I manage about gettin' back to my old troll self?
no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 04:07 am (UTC)This is probably the worst fuckin' thing to happen to me since dieing.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 04:08 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 04:10 am (UTC)What the hell is this place?
no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 04:19 am (UTC)Dying is worse than being human, dumbass.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 04:20 am (UTC)Why should I even tell you? Maybe you should figure it out for yourself!
no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 04:24 am (UTC)You? Are you fucking kidding me? Okay, I've kind of accepted this place's decisions using me as their own personal convenient receptacle for whatever cascading vomit waterfalls its decided to send my way each morning, but you take the fucking grubloaf!
Wait, no, I changed my mind! This is great! Enjoy your new squishy pink self while it lasts, fuckass, because it's going to be expertly carved into tasteful douchebag slivers any time I happen to feel like it.
What point on the timeline are you from, shit can?
no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 04:29 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 04:30 am (UTC)Last thing I remember is that Kan sawed me the fuck in two.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 04:31 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 04:39 am (UTC)Waiting. Or trading in organs at the post office, if you're really desperate.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 04:42 am (UTC)And that doesn't even fucking make sense. If you're some beta doomed timeline piece of shit then that would really just ruin my day all over again.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 04:42 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-07-13 04:43 am (UTC)Trading in organs, you say? That's an awfully weird method of currency. Fuckin' humans.